My love-hate relationship with Japanese toilets

Japanese market street

Japanese market street

One look at their commodes should be enough to convince you that the Japanese have truly achieved a level of evolution surpassing the rest of the world. When anyone can spend that much thought and technology on a fixture used to answer the call of nature… they are clearly a superior culture.

Wikipedia says – “toilets in Japan are generally more advanced than toilets in other developed nations”. That’s an understatement in my view. I mean just LOOK at the functions provided – heating, washing, massage, drying, automatic seat cover movement, deodorization, automatic flushing, air freshener and background music(!). Certainly deserves a superlative like “far more advanced”.

My first experience with a Japanese seat warmer was in the restroom at a high-end restaurant in Delhi (of course I didn’t know it was a Japanese thing back then)… ah the joy of placing your tush on a nicely heated seat in the midst of the freezing Delhi winters. I was converted for life and resolved that heated toilet seats was definitely a feature to be incorporate in my future home.

It wasn’t until a trip to Japan that I encountered the REAL deal… one look at the contraption and I was ready to test out all the functions, fascinated by all the possibilities.

The toilet certainly had better manners than dear Hubby… seeing as how the cover automatically lifted as I walked into the loo. Of course the warm seat was great (as has already been established). Then there was this option of music – from the sound of flowing water (de ja vu to babyhood anyone?) to general musical sounds (perhaps for those who are shy?). Hmmm… I really didn’t get the need for this function… but I guess to each his/ her own. The trouble really started when it came to using the bidet or the spray. I wonder what is anatomically (or maybe it’s just mentally) wrong with me but no matter which option or setting I picked (or how I twisted)… I just couldn’t get it ‘just right’, if you know what I mean…

Hubby on the other hand had no problems whatsoever. I’m hoping I can find a kindred spirit out there who faced similar ‘challenges’, so I won’t have to think that it’s just me.

In the meanwhile, in the pursuit of evolution, we shall still be installing a Japanese porcelain throne in our future dream home.

BTW, I found this blogpost (and there are several out there… proving I am not the only crazy around) with some informative and funny videos on this topic.